Where Do I Begin?!

     Well, 3 glasses of wine in to my exciting Saturday evening in (grading papers online and waiting for my husband to come home from work), I decided to finally look over my colleague Stephanie J.’s blog page. She had told me about the wonderful women she shared her lap band experiences with via blog pages, as well as the amazing time you all had together in Chicago this past year, but nothing could have prepared me for what I saw on your site today. I am floored. I have only read about 4 or 5 recent postings by members but I must say that I am really amazed at the extraordinary stories you all share. I am a Facebook member but, aside from the superficial status updates I occasionally post, I have never written a blog before and I have NEVER posted such personal information on the internet… especially for others to see whom I have never even met before! :)

     As I told Stephanie, I have not had a lap band surgery. However, I have experienced extreme weight loss (over 100 pounds!) and wanted to start blogging so that I can: 1) be part of a support group of women who have been successful in their weight loss efforts and 2) join you all this year on your next trip to meet women across the country who have persevered and reclaimed their own health through extraordinary measures. Although I am not technically a ‘band’ babe, I hope you all will accept me in to your tight-knit group because I would honestly be honored to associate myself with such strong, motivated, beautiful women!

     To share a bit about myself, I have always been a ‘chunky monkey’, since I was at least 6 years old when my parents moved us back home to the U.S. I was born in Massachusetts and lived in England/Germany for my first 5-6 years. THEN, my parents wanted me to come ‘home’ to start grade school. I came home as skinny as a rail and white as a ghost (not a whole lot of sun-bathing and gratuitous snacking happening in England back in the 80’s). Unfortunately, I met my fate of becoming a typical American: I was obsessed with food at every social event and constantly asking myself the question, “What can I eat next?”

     So, to make a long story short, I fattened up pretty quickly. My mom could (or never wanted to) say no to me.

     Well, needless to say, I passed out after my last sentence (and I think FOURTH glass of wine!). Great, for those of you who don’t know me very well, which is pretty much all of you at this point, now think that I’m an alcoholic! Oh well! :) I hope you love me anyway!

     To go into a bit of my weight loss journey, I started almost 4 years ago (next month). I went to my annual OB-GYN check-up. He took my blood pressure and said I could pretty much stroke out at any moment. I think it was in the 160s/100s. He also delivered my daughter over one year before that appointment and told me that I would not be here on this earth much longer if I continued my eating habits and path of self-destruction. He pretty much scared the crap out of me.

     I went running straight to the ER. I had also been having chest pains (a new stressful job and raising my first child, buying my first home, etc.) WELL, in case you didn’t already know this, if you go into the ER and tell them you are having chest pains they take that VERY seriously! (I really had no idea!) So, a lot of testing and 3 or 4 hours later (EKGs, chest x-rays, etc.), they said I was fine… just overweight (thank you, Captain Obvious!)

     After a LOT of crying with my husband and my parents while I was gowned up in the hospital, I headed home. I also suffered from some back pain around this time too (attempted spinal gone wrong during my c-section with my daughter). I knew I couldn’t really ‘hit the gym hard’ (also knee problems), but there was one thing I could do… STOP PUTTING JUNK IN MY MOUTH. Let me tell you, everything came to a SCREECHING halt. I mean, NO more junk food at all: no cupcakes, no candy, no sweets, no soda, no ice cream, no chips (one of my MAJOR weaknesses)… if it didn’t have some solid nutritional value, there was no way in hell I would eat it. I valued my LIFE. I wanted to life for myself and for my daughter. I was done.

     In spite of everyone around me continuing on about their business as usual by eating their normal junk food, leaving cakes in the refrigerator right in FRONT of my fat face, I persevered. I consumed about 1,000 calories per day. I ate to live, not lived to eat. Guess what?! It worked!!! I didn’t document my journey as well as many of you have done in your blogs with charts or diaries. I never had a SPECIFIC goal in mind- a ‘number’. My only goal was health and to LIVE.

     At my heaviest, when I gave birth to my daughter, I weighed 315 pounds. At my lowest (before I just got pregnant with my baby boy), I was down to 169!!! That is the smallest I had been since MIDDLE SCHOOL. It was crazy! I felt great- on top of the world! I was working out 2-3 times per week IN THE GYM (imagine that!) and eating more of the types of foods I wanted because my metabolism was on a RAMPAGE!

     Now, here is where you guys come in! :) Obviously, when you’re pregnant, you gain weight, which I CERTAINLY did. After my son was born July 2010, I lost almost all of it in 2 months (I started eating right and was breastfeeding). But, I have been on quite the holiday rollercoaster at my house. Sweets and junk galore! I have managed to stay pretty reasonable but the scale is going up again (it was 180 this morning) and I am getting extremely discouraged. I don’t even really know if I want to LOSE weight, so calorie restriction isn’t really the answer… but I am definitely not in my health zone like I was when I was losing. I have to get back there…

     Ok, well, I think that’s my first blog. I mean, I can’t possibly give you my life story in 2 pages!!!  I really hope that I haven’t lost all of you readers at this point. I told Stephanie I feel like I am crashing on your guys’ blog. I have just heard such great things about all of you and the support you provide one another and I would love to be a part of it. Ok, I’m going to start stalking… I mean, FOLLOWING, all of you guys now :) I hope you’ll follow me too. MORE to come! :)